By Jason Jimenez, Op-Ed Contributor Tuesday, September 30, 2025Unsplash/K. Mitch HodgeMourning is hard — especially when you’re grieving the loss of a loved one.The sudden loss can feel paralyzing, making it difficult to grasp the depth of your feelings as urgent questions flood your mind: Why is this so painful? Will it ever go away? How can I go on without them? Why did God allow this to happen? I’ve counseled many people through tragedy and loss. Every person grieving has openly admitted that no matter what they do, they can’t shake the pain.During times of deep pain, Christians often admit they feel emotionally numb — cut off from their feelings and unsure how to cope with their loss. It’s common not to know the right way to grieve. It might take days, weeks, or even months to fully process everything. This can be difficult to hear, especially if you’re experiencing a significant loss yourself.A woman, after losing her son, described her early days of grief as feeling like she was trapped in a thick fog. She said that even simple tasks felt too hard for her. Sleep, for her, was an escape until a nightmare rudely woke her up. The journey through griefHaving experienced significant loss and deep grief in my own life, I have learned to rely on my faith in a comforting God as well as the faithfulness of others.First, if there is one thing that has remained true and brought comfort to people in mourning, it is that God’s eternal comfort is stronger than the temporary pain you feel. Paul writes, “For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison” (2 Corinthians 4:17). Your grief may sometimes feel overwhelming, but your earthly hardships are “light” and “momentary” compared to eternity. As C.S. Lewis eloquently said in The Weight of Glory, when you compare your suffering to the glory awaiting you in Christ, the scale tips far beyond what you can imagine. In Christ, the weight of His glory is more sustainable than the weight of unbearable pain. In grief, never lose sight of your eternal perspective. God is eternal, not the pain.Second, as you measure your temporal circumstances against the “eternal weight of glory,” hold fast to the promise that “[God] heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3).Read that again — God heals the brokenhearted! The pain you’re feeling now won’t last forever. God is actively working on your healing, even in this very moment. He will not abandon you. God is present with you in your grief and will provide the comfort you need to get through each day.When your faith falters, cry out like Peter did as he began to sink: “Lord, save me!” (Matthew 14:30).Third, it’s important to remind yourself daily that trials and tribulations aren’t meant to defeat or punish you, but to refine you. Peter writes to the persecuted church, “In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith — more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire — may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ” (1 Peter 1:6-7).While grief may cause depression, don’t let desperation lead you into despair. Make it a morning ritual to pray Psalm 59:16-17 to God: “But I will sing of your strength; I will sing aloud of your steadfast love in the morning. For you have been to me a fortress and a refuge in the day of my distress. O my Strength, I will sing praises to you, for you, O God, are my fortress, the God who shows me steadfast love.”Let God be the one to refresh and restore what you’ve lost. Only He can.You may not see it today or even make sense of the why at this very moment. However, the pain you are experiencing is being woven into a greater purpose — one that extends beyond your current understanding.God never misses your shed tears, nor does He waste the sorrow you walk through. Every ounce of your pain is shaping you more into the image of Christ. My final gentle advice for you is not to rush into “getting back to normal.” Instead, I encourage you to look heavenward and ask: Lord, how can You use my brokenness to bring glory to Your name?God has allowed this season of sorrow for reasons beyond your understanding. Trust that He is working all things — even this tragedy — for good (Romans 8:28).A prayer for the grieving heartOh, Heavenly Father, I am exhausted and desperately need Your help. I’m not sure if I can handle this tragedy in my life, but I trust that You are sovereign and will carry me through this dark valley. Give me strength for today and hope for tomorrow. In Jesus’ name, Amen.Key Scripture verses for meditationPsalm 116:15: “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his faithful servants.”Matthew 5:4: “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”1 Peter 4:12: “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you.”
How to grieve like a Christian when you’ve hit rock bottom
