(Photo: Getty/iStock)
A new academic year is about to begin, and for many freshers, it feels like stepping into uncharted territory. Some are leaving home for the first time, while others may find themselves in an entirely new country without a single familiar face.
The longing for connection and belonging is real – I know, because I’ve been there myself as an international student.
But in the search for friends, it’s worth remembering that not all friendships are the same. As Christians, we long for more than just temporary bonds – we long for friendships that are anchored in Christ; relationships that carry eternal value. These are the friends we’ll one day rejoice with in heaven.
So, what does a true friend in Christ look like?
1. Mutual Christ-rooted love
A true friend loves you with the love of Christ—sacrificial, patient, selfless, and kind (1 Corinthians 13:4–7). They actively care about your wellbeing, not because of what you can give them, but because of who you are in Christ. As Jesus Himself said, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (John 15:13). Godly friends are willing to give, not just receive.
2. Encouragement and spiritual growth
Scripture calls us to strengthen one another in faith: “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing” (1 Thessalonians 5:11). A true Christ-like friend doesn’t just walk beside you—they inspire you to draw closer to Christ. They remind you to stay rooted in the Word, to live out your faith daily, and to look to Jesus when you’re weary or discouraged. As Proverbs 27:17 teaches, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” Godly friendships shape, refine, and strengthen us. They not only pour encouragement into your life but also invite and receive encouragement from you in return.
3. Honesty with grace
Godly friends tell the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). As Scripture says in Ephesians 4:25, “Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbour, for we are all members of one body.” They will not flatter you just to gain your approval, nor will they manipulate or deceive you. Instead, they speak with honesty and integrity, offering gentle correction when needed, always aiming to help you grow in Christ.
4. Loyalty and dependability
Proverbs 17:17 reminds us, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.” A true friend in Christ doesn’t vanish when life gets tough. They stay, they stand with you, and they walk alongside you in both joy and trial.
5. Forgiveness and reconciliation
The Word of God calls us to walk in forgiveness: “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you” (Colossians 3:13). We are also reminded to “make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:3). In Christ-centred friendship, forgiveness is not optional—it reflects the very heart of Jesus. A true friend does not hold grudges, keep a record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:5), let bitterness linger or use silence as a weapon. Instead, they seek peace, extend grace, and work to repair and restore what is broken. Enmity has no place where Christ’s love is the foundation.
6. Prayerfulness
Above all, a godly friend carries you before God in prayer. They don’t just support you emotionally, they also intercede for you, lifting your burdens to the One who hears. James 5:16 teaches us: “Therefore confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.” And Galatians 6:2 reminds us to “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.”
A Final Word
So, as this new semester begins, seek out friendships that make you love Jesus more, not less, and be that kind of friend to others.
True godly friendships aren’t built on convenience or circumstance—they are forged in love, strengthened in prayer, and rooted in eternity.
Finding true friends in Christ: 6 traits to look out for
